Golden vending machines, the DUI barstool, and some North Korean charm June 18, 2009

Well the tradewinds have arrived and along with those blessed heat relieving winds came the rain…which I will gladly take right now because it too is giving my sweat glands a break from the 90 degree weather! Its been a relaxing past day or two. Ive been surfing the web…but not only for leisure…ive been pumping away at a paper due Sunday on NGO websites…and ive discovered that its kinda hard to analye websites becuase they always put theire best foot forward and hide their flaws. Oh well…its a good thing that im good at digging through good to find the bad!

In case you missed it, the military out here in HI has been put on alert due to North Korea. With a shipping vessel leaving North Korean ports carrying unknown things and them test firing a missile aiming it at HI…mortality has risen on my radar. At first when I heard the news I thought…ahh just another Kim Jong Il stunt…then I remembered that I live in HI now..not only that but I live on Oahu with all those military bases…somehow I dont think the missile is aimed at all the cows on Molokai! Oh well…Im not really afraid of death…if it happens it happens…and if it happens to be by nuke then so be it! At least its not death by fish!

In more news about crazy people…a man in Delaware decided it was going to be a good idea to set off fireworks in a local Arbys bathroom…and no one knows why because the man evaded the police…but if his goal was to sink a toilet then he succeeded!

A few months back I blogged about the DUI bar stool event in Ohio…well the man was contemplating selling the stool after he got alot of interest in it…until the Licking County Child Support Agency got wind of it and told him that if he sold it the money would have to go to the $37000 back owed child support he owes…so instead he offfered them the barstool and told them to sell it themselves.

Hmmm…it looks like someone forgot that the economy was bad.  Some German company decided to create a vending machine that will despense gold in ornamental boxes for $42. However, the creator argues that he came up with the idea of gold dispensers just before Lehman Brothers collapsed in September and was further convinced by a heightened interest in the precious metal as a hedge against inflation as the financial crisis rippled around the globe.  Yes…let me pump $42 of my hard earned money (ok..well my financial aid money anyways) into a vending machine so I can get a box of gold that cn sit on a shelf. Yes..it may be gold and worth more then the cash in my wallet…but that cash can buy me food..so ill keep my cash…its called survival.

Later!

Pope porn, Gay elephant, and mom stalking April 13, 2009

Wow…has it really been almost a week since I last blogged?!  This semester Ive been really slacking on my updates of randomness…i guess its just the amount of frustration i have with all the classes that make the idea of more typing even less appealing! Where to start, where to start…well classes are almost done for the semester which makes me very happy.  I kind of have my thesis topic picked and just need to refine it within the next 2-3 weeks. In reality, if I can make it through next week then I will be home free with minimal work left to do, and I cant wait til I get a month off to do nothing but relax!!!

In world news, Al Franken was declared the winner of the election in MN that took place almost 5 months ago…yay Franken.  The American hostage was rescued from the pirates…although if I was held hostage by Johnny Depp I wouldn’t want the military to rescue me, but alas its a good thing they did cause these weren’t no Johnny Depp pirates…

In Taiwan, a man was arrested for throwing money out of a car…almost $30,000 worth…the money wasn’t stolen, just proceeds from a property sale…he was arrested for causing disorder in the streets. But come on! If you saw money flying out of a car, wouldnt you try to collect some too?! Chaos Schmaos..

I cant help but wonder why people are so worked up about a Polish elephant…yes politicians, he may be “gay”, preferring male company to females, but whats the big deal?!  Are you regulating gay marriage among elephants now?!  To top it off, the elephant in question is 10 years old, and wont reach maturity til 14…so who’s to say if hes truly gay or not…maybe hes just Bi!  The reason these politicians seem to be fuming over this is because they were hoping that this elephant would breed and create a whole herd…so even if he is gay…its called artificial insimination! Besides..i guess im just immune to the whole animal gay thing…after all I dealt 5 years at the kennel with frequent visits from the Perez dogs….it was an orgy in the making every time.

So much for strict marriage guidelines in Saudi Arabia…a man divorced his wife my text message.  If only that were possible in the US.  No more filing and lawyer fees, no more wasted time and fighting…for $0.25 you can divorce her, and never hear the whole alimony proposal!  Divorce text messaging is the next big thing in my book!

You know the courts have gone to an extreme when they charge a mother for stalking her son. In Austria, a mom was charged and fined for stalking her son for excessive telephone calls in a 2 year period.  Guess hes not a mamas boy after all!

Oh the FCC will be all over this one…during an airing of a Good Friday church sermon from the Vatican, a Philly cable channel switched to a clip of Girls Gone Wild…hahaha…Oh come on, you know the Pope enjoyed some of those hot college girls going crazy in Cancun as much as you did…just admit it!  the amazing part about this is that although the glitch happened during a religious showing, only one person called to complain, so I guess 1/2 naked girls really are divine…hahaha  I crack myself up!

Well on that note, Im off to work on a bomv scare exercise plan…i get to blow things up…well in my head anyways…

later!

 

Sad idea of fun, crazy people, and a war rant March 26, 2009

I guess since I live out on Oahu, the news of sending more troops to Afghanistan isnt really news.  Its old hat, by now, especially since Im in classes with pretty much all military peeps.  Oh well, I find it funny that the media is focusing on this, especially the fact that there is no “timeline.” Um…did the American public forget we are fighting a counterinsurgency in Afghanistan, and forget that the previous administration never actually fought that insurgency?!  In fact, they opened a wound and let it fester for 7 years. Well, now we pay the price.  Yes troops are being deployed, and yes, there is no timframe for withdrawl, but I bet we will be there for at least a 10 year period. Afghanistan is the wild west in the Middle East, and our solution appears to be right on track, but it will take time. Also of note…we are withdrawing troops from Iraq! The number being deployed to Afghanistan, and those being withdrawn from Iraq=less troops actually deployed over seas in a war zone!  Im not saying im not skeptical of the US’s ability to succeed in the region, cause I am, but at the same time, we cant just not do anything. I was against going in after 9/11…even to Afghanistan. I felt the excuses were flimsy, and where does one draw the line when targeting nations who harbor terrorists…cause heck they had beenliving in the US for some time before the attack…do we attack ourselves?! (Yes I know thats ridiculous).  But even so, once we entered, we cant leave..the job was started and now must be finished, or potential national security issues become reality.

Hey Jindhal…Mt. Redoubt continues to erupt…wanna move to volcano state and see if you want to fund volcano services?  (Ok, yes I know Ive been over this, but everytime I see that it erupts, it reminds me of the idiotic comments…so thus I blog)

A Massachusetts man was arrested and charged with kidnapping and beating his girlfriend following a five-hour-long argument they were having about what the operating hours are for the local library.  Um…kinda extreme since there is this new fnagled device calld Google…have you heard of it?  Maybe it can even inform the girlfriend on why dating abusive idiots is not a good idea!

A Florida man was arrested for trying to commit suicide. But the real issue wasnt his suicide attempt, but how he went about doing it.  According to police, the man tried to gas himself inside his car in a closed garage, but apparently did not have a garage himself, and was arrested for trespass when he drove into a stranger’s garage for the attempt, causing about $1,000 damage. I guess he didnt think that he would have any problems with the trespassing, since he wouldnt be held accountable if he was dead…too bad it failed.

Well Im off to keep my feet up and relax..maybe ill read…for fun for once!  Hmm..such a novel idea, but it is Sspring Break, and fun has been lacking. Is it sad that fun for me invlolves books? Guess Im bucking the wild child notion that my cousin has of me…although there was that Sharpie incident on St Pattys Day…among others…

Later!

Power diplomacy, handcuffs and biting, and a lil’ Mexico March 24, 2009

Well if I ever saw power diplomacy at its finest, it would have to be China’s influence over South Africa when it comes to the Dalai Lama. Too bad it was over something regionally significant, but globally irrelevant. If anything it just hurts South Africa and Chinas perspective in many nations when it comes to triviality over history.  Yes, the Dalai Lama may have opposed China, and been involved in an attempted “coup”, but at the moment, he is a figure head for a place in the world where human rights is a capstone in their interactions with the global community, and to deny him from an international human rights convention, and then justifying it by stating that he would draw attention away from soccer…well now thats stupid. It also reflects that South Africa, post-apartheid, is not ready to venture into the human rights arena which is sad. Their priorities at the moment, strategic protection of their future interests….but I guess that could be said for any state. Kudos for the organizers for cancelling the convention in recognition of the slight.

I love the crazies in the world! And I mean that in the good way!  When I read articles about the eccentric things people do to each other, to themselves, and well what they do in general, it always amazes me that society continues to function at an arguably successful pace.  Take for example, the Connecticut lady who was trying to reconcile with her husband. While he slept, she handcuffed herself to him to force him to have a conversation with her, and when he tried to reach for the phone to call the cops she bit him.  First, I would so not marry a biter (unless its in the kinky good way), Second, where did she get the handcuffs (or do I want to know..were they fuzzy?) and Third, did she think that strategy would end well…guess bedroom diplomacy is still needs some study…phd thesis anyone?!

Finally someone has taken notice, or at least showing some serious respect, to the situation in Mexico. Im still not sold on the Mexican or US course of action, but I will say that its nice that some of our leaders are not imbeciles. Sharing a border with a failing state (or at least a struggling state) is never a good thing, and its only a matter of time before it explodes into the US fully.  Its better to preempt problem, but it may be too late! We’ll see!

Are pre-existing conditions a thing of the past? Not likely, but its nice to hear that health insurance companies are thinking about not charging people more if they have a history of medical problems!

Well, Im off to work on my prospectus. I may have actually had a break through today and developed a new but similar course of action…lets hope it is accepted!

Later!

Crazy hooker shoe lady, God wanted me to take the bus, and beer addicted deer March 11, 2009

Well is it me or is this world getting crazier?  Oddities spring up everywhere…from the worlds largest functioning cell phone in Chicago to beer robbing deer to men jumping over Niagara Falls and surviving!  Add the seoddities to the sheer craziness of people and all the killing that seems to be making the news in the past few weeks, and it makes you wonder if everytime there is a turn in the economy of the world, people react insanely?!

I think today was just a strange day anyways. I was seeing slugs everywhere I went, I watched some crazy lady try walking outside Indigos on some cement retaining wall in clear hooker platform heels, and then start cussing everyone out while she walked down Nuuanu Ave into oncoming traffic.  While this was going on I had some guy telling me that it was Gods plan for him to not take a Taxi and ride teh bus instead because he was meant to witness and help the crazy lady walking down the street…while he sat there and did nothing! Then while crazy God guy wass talking to me about drinking at a Japanese bar and Vietnam (ie the war…he was a vet) some other guy started talking to me. He was a little creepy, but to make matters even stranger I find out hes from Miamisburg and graduates in 1993. The chance that I meet someone who grew up in the same city as me at 10pm outside Hawaii Theatre is kinda wierd!  But it happened. 

Im not sure what to make of today, it seems that everything was just strange…everything. But its done, and hopefully tomorrows strangeness wont involve almost stepping on slugs, crazy hooker shoe lady, or the man ranting on about God…i would be happy if it excluded all the above!

Later!

Aloha Stadium, the leeward coast, and the crazy independence seekers November 29, 2008

Well today started off really early for me…try 2am early…cause thats when I woke up!  So i decided instead of trying to fall back asleep I would get up and go explore Oahu. So at 5am I left my house and headed out to Aloha Stadium(where the NFL Pro Bowl is held) and the Swap Meet that they have there on the weekends.  It was pretty big, with stalls all over the parking lot full of clothes, crafts, artwork, jewelry, etc.  There were some cool finds, but I didnt buy anything.  There were a few things I liked, but Im a broke grad student, so money is at a premium and I didn’t splurge…but I may down the line before I leave Hawaii.

My plan was to leave the stadium and go explore the Dole Plantation, but there was a glitch in the plan.  Mainly that I was an idiot and missed my connecting bus stop and ended up taking a long tour out to Waianae which is on the leeward side of the island.  Its a completely different atmosphere out there than in Honolulu and Waikiki…or even in Keneohe! My favorites from the bus trip were: seeing the Hawaii revolution signs wanting to take back the islands from the US and become its own sovereign country(which were all over Waianae), windsurfers, and the crazy campers/Hawaiian independence seekers making the beach their home.  They are all over the coast out in Waianae! Apparently there was some kind of parade out there today too, and they were closing down all the roads.  I didnt go explore off the bus much since Im a major Haole out there…and its different than dealing with the locals in Honolulu/Waikiki.  They are use to us there, but Waianae..it could have been bad!

So instead of hitting the Dole Plantation (which I will have to do another day), I rode the bus around the island. In the middle of the island heading towards the leeward side, theres a stretch that reminds me alot of Ohio…especially like the Warren and Butler County areas. It warmed the heart, but then random palm trees began to appear and I was back to reality of Hawaii. 

Random google searches that led to my blog “Wierd news about crossdressers” cool pitbull drawings” and “little crossdresssers”.  Hmm…someone really wants to find out about crossdresssing…

Later!

Shutter crazy, more griping, and my stalker November 19, 2008

Manipulations with the light at Waikiki

Manipulations with the light at Waikiki 2

Waikiki Sunset

 

Dumb move of the day by the government…not approving a 25 billion dollar bail out…I hope they have something else in mind for those people who are about to hit the unemployment lines?!  Any welfare state security systems in place? I dont see any!  How about retraining for new jobs, development of alternative employment like green energy, etc…im just mad.  Not that I liked the idea of a bailout, but unemployed flooding the the already weak economy could be devastating! And if Dems think they can blame a certain Republican President on this, then they obviously haven’t been paying attention, because, hes about to go, and then they will have to take responsibility for their work efforts!

Well I spent most of the day studying and taking pictures at Waikiki today.  It was relaxing until some creepy guy decided he wanted to follow me around and tell me that he loved me.  He was perverse…take your mind and put it in the gutter…and your right with me.  I feel like I need a shower after that run-in! If the bus hadn’t come, I probably would have punched him! Ahhh!

I did get some decent pics though, and I’ve posted a few for you to see…hopefully you like them!

Random google search that led to my blog…”crazy University of Dayton lady”.  Now I know im a UD grad, and a little crazy, but i am certainly not the crazy protest lady on the corner of Stewart and Brown!  I dont even remember mentioning her or UD for that matter, so this one just makes me go Hmmm all the more!

Later!

Im not really sure what Im typing, but thank god for spell check November 1, 2008

done

Walking around Waikiki on Halloween

 

Um…me, Kyle…and I cant remember

Kyle and Erik

Kyle and Michael

Melanie and the Greenpeace Masacre

Channelling my African Voodoo

Kyle and the Pimp Cane

Well its almost 4am and I just got home…and I drank a bottle of Jager by myself (it was a smaller bottle)…and Im definitely feeling the winding down as the alcohol leaves my system…Erik and the gang are probably still at Level 4 partying it up in Waikiki, but I was afraid that if I stayed out much longer I would totally never make it home! 

Tonight was fun…Halloween in Waikiki is nuts!  Think wall to wall people, drinking, in costumes, with a little bit of Mardi Gras thrown in…Chaos….and I love it!  The best costumes I saw tonight…Teletubbies, Mario Bros, some guy who was completely naked except a few strings(his ass was totally showing), and the Michael Jackson group…where some guy dressed up as Michael and the rest of his friends were the zombies from the Thriller video…They performed and all…I thought I got them on video, but apparently my drunkenness didnt actually record the whole thing..I got like 2 seconds of footage of it…but it was awesome! 

We started at Eriks and then went to Level 4, where I left the group, and wondered Waikiki for a little but before heading home…I love the craziness!  Everyone should come to Hawaii next Halloween…they will have a guaranteed good time…

Well Im off…

Later

Chemical burns, drama, and hysterical conversations October 20, 2008

Well today began interesting and ended interesting…I have been home for at least 3 hours now, and haven’t done anything but talk to Eric…who has been cracking me up!  He’s been on duty for the past 3 days and got home late last night…and has spent the entire day looking like hes stoned! (Hes not!)  Im attributing it to the lack of sleep and all the chemicals hes been sniffing at work…plus he got a chemical burn on his butt after he fell in the chemicals…the boy is a mess!  And all this isnt including his normal girl drama!  Dear god, he seriously is like a little brother sometimes…such a dork!

Random conversations I have had today with people…1)talk about black nipple hair (dont ask!)  2)porn (thats the conversation I woke up to)  3)musical paper   4)chemical burns (gee I wonder who)  and 5) psychiatric counseling.  My life is interesting some days! 

Random life update for everyone…If all goes as planned I will be in Tunisia, Egypt or Jordan over the summer learning Arabic through a State Dept scholarship program…and then in the Spring of 2010, I will be studying in Slovenia at the University of Ljubljana.  I miss traveling!  So im taking it all on!  If I am able to do this, then I should be able to graduate “on time”…I may have to take a class oveer the summer 2010 to finish my GC but MA would be done…Keep you posted!  Well Im off to write a paper thats due …well…today. Dang!

Crazy google search of the day that led to my blog…”Hookers”…Gee I wonder how many google pages they had to go through until they hit my blog…Im betting alot!

Later!

Becoming a pillow, an old dog can learn new tricks, and a little witchcraft September 15, 2008

Frickers

 

Be careful what you wish for…or what you say…or what you claim.  Because if it has anything to do with witchcraft, then let it be known that there are still persecutors and it can turn deadly.  The salem witch trials live on…in the Congo.  So apparently after a soccer game, someone accused a player of using witch craft to win the game, and thus a riot broke out killing 13 people between the ages of 11-16. The weapon of choice is not fire this time…its angry people trampling and squeezing the air from your lungs.  So rule number 1: avoid the congo (as if there weren’t enough reasons to stay away). Rule 2: if you claim to be a witch (or you are one…hey this blog doesn’t discriminate or care!) then don’t use your magic (for good or evil) to aid in sports outcomes.  And rule 3: Stay away from soccer…it kills!

So why do I always attract the crazy old ladies?  Why I ask!  So as if talking to me about random events in their lives and trying to convert me to random religions weren’t enough, now they are using me as a pillow for their bus ride naps at 4 in the afternoon!  I give up…between the rain and the crazzy old ladies my life will never be the same…I will be a perpetual pillow and a drowned rat!  If my hair is frizzy at the wedding Jess you will know why! 

So apparently you can teach a dog new tricks, specifically how to dial 911.  Aparently a german shepard dialed 911 and saved its owners life.  Now I am wondering if the dog actually called 911, or 911 was on speed dial (like those emergency response bracelets not actual speed dial, I mean who would do that?! Its only 3 numbers!), or if in actuality the dog just started pounding numbers and lucked out.  Who knows…but Carrie you better start teaching Derbie how to do this in case one day Aaron gets hit by a car mowing that lawn of yours! 

Class was uneventful for the most part, but several of us got to teach Ali about the inner workings of the US south and kentucky in-breeding (well the rumors anyways).  He thought it was hilarious and so we ended up talking about how everyone was percieved and how Texas would be the first state to succeed from the union and take over california, all the while executing those hippies.  It was a fun conversation to day the least, and Ali (from Turkey) will never be the same.

Oh and enjoy the Pic…its an homage for Jessie..In memory of Frickers! Sorry!

Later!